Archive for June, 2007

Penang – The Pearl of the Orient

June 17, 2007 at 12:30 am · Filed under Malaysia, Travel

Approach: Penang has an international airport with limited international connectivity. But domestic airlines connect it well with KL. Air Asia & Malaysian Airlines fly to Penang. It is just around 4 hrs by road from KL

Penang consists of a thin stretch of mainland on peninsular Malaysia and a nice island where Georgetown, the capital city is located. For history and research freaks please refer Wikipedia : Penang

I was lucky that my company flew me to Penang for a meeting on Friday. I would have ended up looking foolish if I returned the same night. I sponsored my 2 day extension in Penang I am still revelling on the experience.

Penang has a ‘mainland’ part and a island part connected by 13.5 km bridge. Georgetown is the capital city of Penang. Due to the numerous factories of many MNCs setup in this region, there is a healthy expat population. I vaguely remember reading an article which claimed Georgetown to be one of the top-10 locations for expats in SE Asian region.

Penang reminds me of Mysore in the sense that it is a wonderful combination of luxuries of a small city with the pace of a town. As you move out of Georgetown towards the northern part of the state, the beauty of the place is revealed. Lined with clean, uncluttered beaches, there are several beach resort around the Batu Ferringhi Area & Tanjung Bungah. Batu Ferringhi has some of the expensive resorts costing RM350 upwards. You can get real bargains if you get to the Tanjung Bungah area.

Penang is notorious for piracy (imagine a ‘China town’ the size of that island). You get more than bargain in terms of RM4 per DVD. Beware, there is a firm warning posted at the airport about harsh fines for carrying pirated DVDs. But has any punishment been able to stop crime?

Things to do: Water sports – water scooter is heavenly for amateurs because the see is fairly placid; pasar malam (night market); drinking
Places to visit :

1. Penang Hill : Best time would be 6PM, enjoy daylight and also night fall. You can take a taxi but my recommendation is take a bus. You can easily find a bus to go to Komter and from Komter you take a bus for Penang Hill. It will drop you off at a place 700m before the hill. The bus trip is lovely and gives you a feel of the city.

2. Snake Temple : Some live snakes ‘guard the temple’. They have a small snake farm attached to the temple. For a RM1, you can see snake feeding on a live animal.

3. War Museum: One of its kind. Slightly oversold. But if you have time, you should take up the shooting game for RM75, it lasts an hour. It real fun to shoot fake bullets in a simulated warfield.

4. There is a musuem in the city which is worthwhile if you are history buff.

5. Orchid Farm

6. Butterfly farm

A nice weekend getaway.

View from my Hotel Room

Leave a Comment

The 3 Layers of Love

June 17, 2007 at 12:20 am · Filed under Random Thoughts

Describing love is a little like Heisenberg Principle. ‘The more accurately you try to describe the more away from it you get’. Ergo, you can either describe (measure) it or be in it. I am just describing it.

There are 3 layers of love in a lasting relationship. (you have heard it? tarry my friend). I avoided the use of ’stages’ because it would imply a chronology.

1. Spark:  It is that momentary foolishness that blinds you. Those wobbling of legs, being tongue-tied etc all fall in to this category. Sparks happen all through out the life with so many people, but like its name it disappears in a ‘moment’. Spark is essential to spice up the relationship. In a mature relationship, it need not be the wobbling of the legs but some surprise, a romantic getaway

2. Fulfillment: This is the stage where, to use Scott Peck’s words, the couple should spiritually enhance each other. In simple words, it represents those activities and moments which the couple enjoys doing together – like hiking, going to movies, singing together et al.

3. Co-Existent: This is the fundamental need, nothing romantic about it but constitutes nearly 3/4th of the ‘transactions’ in a relationship. These needs are very basic: physical need, security, societal pressures, work sharing, role playing. This is very ‘animal’ and essential need.

Just look around and analyse the relationships around you. I found most of the couples ‘co-exist’. (please note that the opinions are based on Indian middle-class life).  While arguing about arranged marriages, my parents often quote ‘Do you think uncle xyz is not happy?’. While I dont want to get into the debate of ‘what is happy?’, I simply believe what my parents are calling ‘happy’ is a healthy ‘co-existence’.

Failed ‘love-marriages’ are simply because they make decisions on a prolonged spark and semi fulfillment. Just because they love to see movies together doesnt mean that you will enjoy with that person the rest of your life.

Co-existing lovers. I have known romantic couples who get into the grind of life and forget the basis of their relationship – spark & fulfillment . Mundane needs like sex, bringing up children, doing household chores become a part of their existence. The just exist and fail to Live

An ideal relationship, in my mind, starts with a spark, finds both fulfillment and co-existence. It is important to have sparks  going in the already old relationship also. A surprise getaway, an unannounced trip, a bunch of red roses should do the magic…

Leave a Comment

‘Are you a virgin?’

June 2, 2007 at 11:25 am · Filed under India, Random Thoughts

<Inspired by a real question but fictionalised. Any characters resembling any person dead or alive is purely intentional. Names changed. Opinions are largely in Indian middle-class perspective>

‘Are you a virgin’? , It struck Anshu right on the face when she asked it. Like, near death experience his life flashed before his eyes, the girls he had tried to woo, the girls who tried to woo him, those evenings at the disco, those drunken days…. those days of forced celibacy. Being a virgin was a matter of pride for him, a indicator of his self control, the pillar of his personality, the foundation of his thought that relationship should not be based on just physical interaction.

‘Are you a virgin?’ sounded really cool, when Mahima Choudhary asked in Pardes . We all gossiped about it and really felt that Indian Cinema had come of age. Almost a decade later when Sarla asked him this question, he went through the near-death experience.

Arranged marriage had already become a nightmare for Anshu like many a men in India because one has to conform to a system he didnt believe in but had no choice than bow to the societal pressures falling on conservative boy who grew up in the hinterland. He was forced to go through the charade of meeting girls and asking about their ‘long-term goals’ (sic). He liked bold girls, one with substance, but this one was especially bold and she started off our discussion with this question.

He recovered a minute later and replied ‘ What would you prefer?’ She rhetorically replied, ‘ I want my future husband to be a virgin’. He drew a long breath and said ‘Sarla, before I answer your question, let me give you a perspective’

‘Dont judge a person in binary – virgin or not. There are 3 kinds of virgins and 3 kinds of non-virgins. The first kind of virgin is because of the society. He is afraid of what would happen if he crosses the line drawn by the society. The second type is because of lack of opportunity. He is all set to ‘do it’ but there are no takers. The third type is the one who believes, love should precede physical relationship and hasnt taken any relationship beyond love. Type I is a coward, Type II is a horny loser, Type III is of the noble type’

‘Non-virgins are again of 3 types. The first kind because he got into a relationship which blossomed into love and furthered into love making. The second kind is the one who is found lurking around the one-night-stand and has sleazy escapades. The third has paid money to lose his V. ‘

Type I is the true lover. Type II is a horny hog. Type III is a dirty dog.

I consider a true lover who has severed his old ties more desirable than any type of virin and a coward only better than a dirty dog. ‘

‘A Type I or II virgin wouldnt be able to be as loyal as the Type I non-virgin. I prefer to be a true lover than any other kind of virgin’

She was fretting impatiently while he was giving her unsolicited advise. Then she must have been thinking ‘Just tell me yes or no’

The discussion for me was over there. Anshu nonchalantly started walking away muttering ‘ The world is not black and white’. While she was just about to stamp ‘no-virgin’, Anshu turned back and said ‘By the way, I am virgin’

Anshu told me this story over a couple of drinks. I asked him why he walked away with just one question. He replied ‘She was not of my type’. Sometimes just one question screams out many a answer.

I was reflecting on how our generation is like a half boiled egg – the outer layer is firm but inner layer is so fluidy and confused. I relate to Anshu quite well because we are of such similar backgrounds. Having brought up in the hinterland of the Hindi belt, being a (pre-marital) celibate, tee-totaler, non-smoker is a sign of noble man. The values were fine when the world was so black and white but not anymore. People who have violate the Hindu tenet of ‘not crossing the seven seas’ going around the world, have seen the firm foundation of ‘values’ wobbling on its knees.

Anyways, Anshu is yet to find his life companion. With his permission, I decided to blog his theory because I thought it would bring things in perspective.

Comments (7)